Today began at 5:00 am... well no it really began at 6:00 am, but it felt like 5 thanks to the time change. It really hasn't sunk in for me just yet.
Today was interesting. It began with quiet devotional time and breakfast with the TA. That was a nice way to start things off, and he gave me some great encouragement. It's very hard for me to think positive thoughts about myself lately, and that's making it harder for me to function. I know that from experience, and yet I'm having a really hard time trying to think more positively about myself. So having Solomon say that he believes in me, really helps me remember that I should be trying to believe in me too.
The morning went well, getting kids off was OK, not perfect, but no big tantrums, or timeouts needed, and the kids were well behaved and cooperative too.
I then went for a walk while I talked on the phone with my sister. That was nice, and helped me remember that I am not the only person on the planet. When I came home I had a visit with a friend for most of the rest of the morning. That was nice too.
While we visited, I did a decent job of being aware of the youngest two Professors, and took care of their needs fairly well. There was some teary feedback from Prof Jaden, because we were having a dialogue about wants versus needs, and appropriate emotional expression. Having visitors always helps me be patient, because I keep my temper in check when I am observed.
Two doses of nasty medicine were successfully administered to Prof Cirdan, with great cooperation on everyone's part. Prof Thea and I did an intense session of homework, with an emotional episode. It went well from my point of view, I stayed calm, stayed present, and helped her overcome her own mental blocks, and figure out the math problems she had to complete. I feel really good about that.
I used a reward system very heavily today, and things went really well, partially as a result.
Now, I am supposed to be including a reflection on how I am not in control.
Today is a great example of when I can fall into the illusion that I am in control, because what I tried to do today, seemed to work. But the truth is that I was blessed today with patience from God, and that patience helped me hang in when I was temped to give up or get angry. With God all things are possible, and though I went into the day unsure about what I could do to have a better attitude about my duties, and assignments, God was with me, because the day went well.
Thanks, Lord, for the parking space.
